
In Season 2 Episode 4 of the reality TV show, Young Famous & African, some comments from multi-award winning Nigerian artiste, Tu Face Idibia, triggered explosive reactions online and offline.
If you missed it, or you’ve never heard of the show, picture this:
Tu Face is enjoying what looks like an expensive dinner. He is flanked by five other celebrities at the table. Small talk is leading to more small talk. Popular South African TV personality, Andile Ncube, begins to compliment Tu Face and his wife about their marriage.
Suddenly, out of nowhere, Tu Face starts to express some strange thoughts:
Tu Face: “So for me, the way I look at marriage, and the way I look at relationships now is… just say what you want… I just wanna f*ck! Just say it.”
An awkward silence grips everyone at the table. His wife, Annie Idibia (now ex-wife), sitting next to him, tries to caution him about his language. But he goes on:
“I’m only going to make love to who I love. But I can–I can f*ck when my ‘manly nature’ asks me to f*ck.”
Unable to contain her own exasperation, female rapper and media personality Nadia Nakai, interrupts him with a question. From here, it starts to evolve into a dramatic exchange:
Nadia: “Hold on, hold on, wait, sorry, wait — are you saying this specifically (applies) to you?”
Tu Face: “Like it or not, men are wired like that — a man would love a woman to hell, but maybe he’s somewhere, his d”ck would just decide something else —”
Nadia: “No, his mind. Not his d*ck, it’s not its own entity —”
Tu Face: “Okay, however you look at it, he will f*ck —”
Despite the uneasiness in the body language of his fellow media stars, Tu Face continues to ratchet up the tension with every attempt to reply or explain.
In order to ensure he is not being misunderstood, Annie, Nadia, and others start pressing him to clarify. They want to know if he is simply generalizing or if he is revealing his own personal beliefs. In one final, frustrated response, he blurts out:
“I am saying this is what I feel! This is what I think. This is how I reason.”
Before we get into the meat of this essay, let me explain what it is, and what it is not.
This is not a moral preach, sermon, or Bible study lesson. Instead, it is a much-needed exposition about the one thing responsible for all the misery of human life.
For most people, it is an uncomfortable thing to talk about. We would rather discuss happiness, wealth, success, and whatever the process is for achieving these things. But when it comes to sin, it is as if we are not supposed to say too much.
The reason why this is important — as we shall see — is that we cannot fully appreciate the magnitude, or the necessity, of being saved by God if we are unaware of the extent to which we are captured by the problem of sin.
Perhaps you are someone who thinks the idea of sin and sinfulness is just religious nonsense which has no place in any serious public conversation. My hope is that this essay will urge you to think again.
As you read this essay, you will begin to notice the pernicious reality of sin, not just in the outside world, but in your own life.
Returning to the scene at the dinner table, it is clear that Tu Face was trying to communicate something. But it is not clear if he understood the significance of what he was trying to say. Take, for example, this statement:
“Like it or not, men are wired like that.”
On the surface, it looked as if he was just describing how difficult it is for a man to rebel against his own primal urges. But if you cook this statement in the pot of Scripture and boil it prayerful meditation, you will begin to see the smoke of this thing we are trying our best to hide from.
Sin.
Everyone has a general idea of what sin is. But what is it, really.
We know it as a verb. That is, to do something. To either commit a wrongdoing, or omit a rightdoing. But is that all?
Again, let us recall what Tu Face said:
“Like it or not, men are wired like that.”
“I am saying this is what I feel! This is what I think. This is how I reason.”
It looked as if he was only trying to make factual statements. But on the other hand, if you are familiar with his prolific history of extramarital relations, it is not hard to see why his co-celebrities were repulsed by what they were hearing.
That being said, let us not get distracted. We are on to something here.
What happened in this episode was extraordinary. I suspect he was not aware of it himself, but Tu Face managed to sum up the greatest predicament of the entire human race.
If we dig into the core of what he was trying to say, our shovels will hit something that sounds like this:
“I am a sinner, and I cannot help myself.”
Take a few moments to look at his statements again.
It becomes crystal clear when you look at a previous comment he made at the table. He spoke of a ‘manly nature’ as if it was something he feels obliged to obey.
In essence, he was describing a natural propensity to act in a certain type of way. A natural predisposition he feels unable to control.
That predisposition is sin.
Not the verb form, but the noun. This is the factory setting, the default state, the basic nature, or the usual condition of every man — and woman.
In his famous letter to the church in Rome, Paul elaborates:
“I have discovered this principle of life—that when I want to do what is right, I inevitably do what is wrong. I love God’s law with all my heart. But there is another power within me that is at war with my mind. This power makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me.”
— Romans 7:21-23 [NLT]
It is easy to be disgusted at Tu Face’s remarks and to call him names. To be clear, I do not think his statements justify his moral decisions. But at the very least, you have to give him credit for telling the truth. The truth that you are unwilling to tell yourself.
You are a sinner, and you cannot help yourself.
How is it possible that you are able to recognize and judge error in others, but you cannot identify it in yourself?
The reality of sin is not unique to Tu Face or Paul the apostle. It is a principle at work in all of us.
“For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” — Romans 3:23 [NIV]
In our modern world, so many of us are allergic to this verdict. If you suggest to someone that he is a sinner, he will likely curse, dismiss, mock you and move on as if the point does not merit some thinking.
Look at this tweet for example:
This, at best, betrays a state of innocent ignorance. At worst, it is symptomatic of dangerous pride. Sin is a nature, and if you have been paying attention, you would have noticed it in yourself.
Whether or not you are convinced of how it came to be, the fact remains that it is at work in you.
“I am saying this is what I feel! This is what I think. This is how I reason.”
Tu Face may not have been able to explain why he feels, thinks, and reasons that way. But the man is supremely conscious of something happening inside him. He is aware of a feature in himself and in others, which others are too fearful or too proud to admit.
This feature is the tendency to do the wrong thing, regardless of context or consequence.
This feature is sin.
Of course you may have done some good deeds in your life, but that is not your default mode. Your default is to be selfish, to envy, to lust, to be greedy, to covet, to scheme and manipulate, to lie, to plunder, to rage, to abuse, and to kill.
Are you beginning to see why an ancient group of people needed the Ten Commandments?
Even today, in our high-tech societies with our complex systems of law and order, we still sin. Children are still disobedient. Parents are still abusive. Neighbours are still vindictive. Landlords are still unpleasant. Doctors are still negligent. Politicians are still corrupt. Judges still miscarry justice. Businesspeople still lie, cheat and fail to honour agreements.
Everywhere around us, sin is still the norm. It is the constant factor.
If you are not a stranger to your own sin, then you know what it is like when you try to oppose it. You know the feeling: that tension, that resistance within. You know it is real. As real as your heartbeat.
Even on those days when you resolved to be on your best behaviour, you can recall the moments when your sin broke out of its cage.
“Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin and death?” — Romans 7:24 [NLT]
This is why we need saving. This is why humanity desperately needs to be changed. This is the purpose of the gospel of Jesus Christ. It is not a message about free tickets to board Heaven Express, it is about what has been done to free you from the power of sin.
“Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord.” — Romans 7:25 [NLT]
Friends, a denial of sin is a denial of reality — which itself is a sin, because that is a lie.
On a very personal level, we all know what sin is. Everyone knows. Even the owner of that tweet. He knows. He knows sin, not as a concept, but as an element in himself. His problem is that he would sooner die than seek the redeeming mercy of a higher power.
For him, that would be a humiliating choice to make. Because it violates everything that makes him feel like an independent, autonomous agent capable of deciding his own destiny.
For him, it is in his “best interests” to deny that there is such a thing as an authority above himself. He would rather suppress the truth than face it.
“ But God shows his anger from heaven against all sinful, wicked people who suppress the truth by their wickedness. They know the truth about God because he has made it obvious to them.” — Romans 1:18-19 [NLT]
The good news is that we are not hopeless. There is a way out.
But first, you need to come face to face with your sin. You need to grab it by the collar and look it dead in the eye. It is right there.
Even if you have been a Christian all your life, you need to face it. Because if you never had to face your sin before you came to Christ, you need to wonder how you became a Christian.
Being saved is not about being sorry for some indiscretions in your past life. It is about knowing that you have been set free from the power of sin in your present life.
Like Tu Face, you are a sinner and you cannot help yourself. That is the exact reason why you need Jesus Christ.
I love this, thanks for sharing.
To my fellow readers don't miss this
"Being saved is about knowing that you have been set free from the power of sin"